Monday, April 25, 2022

U is for Ugly


U is for Ugly -- Ugly or Pretty? Does it matter at 63?

I know that we all came into the world with different appearances (except for my husband and his identical twin brother and other identical twins). Some of us have long noses. Some of us have big lips. Some of us have green eyes. Some of us have brown eyes. Some of us have straight hair while others have curly hair.

I've always struggled with self-confidence. I remember a boss telling me one time that we have to earn our self-confidence. 

In my Senior year of high school, I was in the top 17 (weird #, right?) of the school beauty pageant. The band actually voted and I was the one nominated to represent the band in the beauty pageant. I remember being so shocked because I NEVER thought I was pretty back then. When I was 22 or 23, I was in the "Iron Man Ski Queen" competition and was first runner up. This was a ski tournament held on a local lake and the Ski Queen and her first runner up (me!) donned our bathing suits and rode around in a ski boat and did the queenly wave to everyone! To be the queen, we didn't even have to know how to ski!

this picture and the one below
were from my portfolio from
the ski queen competition

For all of my life, I have struggled with my weight. If I could only weigh now what I weighed back then, I would be happy . . .YET . . .back then I thought I was fat. 

These days I have to watch every bite I eat to keep off the weight I lost in 2017 and 2018. Here are a couple of pictures showing the 70+ pound difference.

And then while I was digging through old photos, I found the picture below. I was in my early 20's and I'm amazed. If I were to see this picture of someone else, I would think "how lovely." Yet, I never felt "lovely" way back then.

this was my very first trip on
an airplane! I had dark
hair before I started
going gray!

Now I'm 63 . . .and I'm not a big make up wearer but I ALMOST always wear lipstick which was so weird when masks were required!

When our son married, I was much heavier than when our daughter married and I'll be honest. When I look at pictures of myself at the two events, I definitely think I look prettier when I'm thinner.

As a Christian, I know that God looks at our hearts so I try not to get hung up on my outward appearance. As I've shared here before, I don't always dress up. I'm happiest in tennis shoes or flip flops, exercise shorts, and a t-shirt. I like to have a little tan on my face so that I don't have to wear much make-up (have you ever used tan towelettes? they are my favorite!).

I prefer comfy dresses and casual shoes -- once again, tennis shoes when possible or FitFlops or Vionic. I prefer a swipe of mascara but I do love this heated eye lash curler. That is another thing - as I've aged, I have less and less eyelashes. Someone told me that eyelashes don't regrow - is that true? When I have my hair colored, my hair salon will also swipe some on my eyebrows which helps a little. I usually use a little "lello lotion" (what our kids called it when they were little) on my face and a little under-the-eye concealer and some blush and some lipstick and my make-up is complete.

denim skirt from Talbots, shirt from
Stitch Fix, Fitflop sandals (and 
Bob Goff!)

all dressed up at a wedding

comfy dress and fitflops at
the beach

No matter what age you are, do you feel pretty? What do you do to make yourself feel better about yourself? I've always struggled with my self-confidence. Do you?

p.s. Amazon and clinique have no idea I even exist so I'm not getting a kickback - I just love the things I mentioned.


  1. What an inspiration you are! I, too, have always struggled with self-confidence; then, in 1970-something the Jaycee-ettes voted me 'ugliest.' I've never forgotten that. Imagine my surprise when someone at church yesterday told me I looked like a model.

    1. I had to read your comment three times because I couldn't believe that any organization would have a category called "ugliest." Oh my goodness! I only know you through our blogs but you seem lovely inside and out!!!

  2. I got diverted by the comment above. How could any organisation be so insensitive to vote someone the ugliest…seems like the person who invented that was the ugliest!

    Back to your post…I suspect many of us think we’re not pretty but like you, when I look back at my younger photos I see why other people thought so. Not beautiful in a model kind of way though. I don’t see self-confidence tied to beauty though.

    Visiting from

    1. I was horrified that an organization would have that as a "category."