our hearts are broken but yet we know . . .

Life is so hard.  We have cried many tears since 12:09 on Sunday morning when the phone rang.  When the phone rings in the middle of the night it is rarely good news and this was no exception.  We received word that our sweet friend had died unexpectedly in an accident in her home.  I was looking through some of my pictures tonight and came across this one of Butch.  Look at her smiling face.  She is on the left in the red shirt.  She and her daughter, Mary hosted a shower for Glenn and Lauren in December 2010 and this picture was taken that night. 

I want to tell you a little about Butch but I don't even know where to begin.  I've been trying to think of my first memories of her and I think it was back when Mary was in college and Butch and I were in a weight loss/Bible study group together at church.  I remember liking her a lot.  Over the years our friendship grew and our families intertwined.  I was right in the middle.  Butch was 15 years older and Mary was 15 years younger.  Butch was like me (Mary, too).  We are loud and we laugh a lot and we talk a lot.  When Laura and Glenn were six years old, Mary started babysitting for us.  Butch and Mark's momma were off on some trip together . . .somewhere around the world . . .perhaps in Egypt . . .climbing a pyramid.  No, really.  They were.  Mary babysat for us until we didn't need a babysitter anymore.  She would put our kids in the car and head off on an adventure.  Our kids adored her.  They called her "miss mary."  So our families now had a multi-generational friendship.

Butch was so generous.  She was generous with her money and she was generous with her time.  She was chairman of a circle for years . . .until all the little ladies died off . . .and she was MUCH younger than those little ladies.  That was her ministry at the time.

oh my next memory of Butch was another circle memory.  I was in the "young mother's" circle which meant we were a daytime circle and a nursery for our children was provided.  If you don't know what a circle is . . .it is a group of United Methodist Women that meets monthly.  Butch was not a young mother but she was keeping her brother's young child and she needed a nursery.  I loved getting to know her even more.  Once again she was giving of herself . . .keeping her brother's child.

Butch gave freely.  Just Sunday afternoon . . .hours after she died . . .I was baking a cake and I said to Mark, "Butch gave this measuring cup to me."  Might sound trivial but touches of her are all around us.  She was always thinking of others.

Butch loved Jesus.  Butch loved Jesus so very much.  We were so blessed to be in the same church family and even in the same Sunday school family.  Butch drove Mark's momma to Bible study every Wednesday night.  Butch was always giving of herself.

I started writing this post days ago . . .I still can't write enough . . . I still hurt . . . I know this post is rambling and probably makes sense to no one but to me . . .and maybe some day not even to me . . .but Butch loved to dance and I know that Butch is dancing with Jesus.

My son, Glenn and I had a conversation this week about heaven.  We talked about whether or not we will actually know others in heaven.  Of course, neither of us really has an answer to that question.  I know on a theological level we probably won't know others . . .but this week, I've needed comfort.  This is the same week that my momma died and was buried many years ago - way back when I was 15 . . .there is that number 15 again.  I wonder if Butch met my momma this week.  I hope Butch shared with her that I grew up into a woman who loves Jesus.  I hope they can be friends in  heaven . . . .another link.

Our hearts are broken . . . but we know she is with Jesus.